How would I know what you might be going through?
Although never in the Military, I have been surrounded by the culture for over two decades, with four immediate family members in the Australian Defence Force.
My brother has 25 + years service, husband 20 years, our eldest son (aged 27) ten years, and our middle son (aged 20) 3 years.
With close on 60 years service and ten deployments between the four of them, along with dozens of exercises in and out of country, I have experienced a huge range of situations with them, and/or their colleagues, our friends who are now family, where someone has been impacted in one way or another, physically, mentally, financially, socially or otherwise.
As a Military spouse, sister and mother, I am acutely aware of what goes on at home during exercises and deployments within the family unit. In addition we have relocated on posting ten times in the last 17 years, and lived apart (interstate) for 3.5 years due to family circumstances not suiting the posting cycle. During the first two years we were together my husband was away on exercises and deployment for 18 months of that posting. (Note: We are a blended family with 5 children and four ex's between us so I've learned a lot, by trial and error, about step-parenting and blending the family in a way that supports everyone).
Over the past 17 years I have supported both Members and their spouses through breakups, makeups, issues with reconnecting after exercise, deployment and separation, parenting, and finding balance personally and professionally.
More recently, in the past three years, I have presented my Connection Mastery workshop many times at the seven SCB Unit sites Nationally, and coached over 200 Defence and APS Members within the Branch as they lean towards a culture of workplace well-being.
How can I support you?
I have online tools and short courses available here in my Teachable School. I've written these specifically based around what worked best for me over the years, and what's helped my one on one clients and group participants most effectively.
I run online group programs and take on limited one on one clients from time to time.
Why a Group Program? I don't want anyone else to know my business..
It's well known that most people would rather suffer alone than reach out and have others know they are not coping. We seem to be more worried about what others think than of our own well-being. Not asking for help will not work for you, end of story.
We are not wired for isolation. My groups are carefully monitored, full of support, tools, tips, and great conversations. My programs are highly personalised and strictly confidential.
When you're participating in a zoom call with other people in similar situations to you, someone will ALWAYS ask a question that you either hadn't thought of, or aren't quite comfortable asking. My answer to that one person will help you or another participant in a profound way. I have seen it happen so many times and found group work to be extremely worthwhile.
What can I do right now to start feeling better?
Start with Finding Balance. It's my flagship course, online and self-paced. You'll be guided through a worksheet that helps you identify areas where you might need to make some changes in order to create more balance in your life. I provide tips, ideas, action items and resources that you can use straight away.